Thursday, August 23, 2007

"Ican has Pwland?"

As if I weren't busy enough...

No, dear readers, one country is not enough. It's simply not enough to pack up all my things and move to the Middle East to see what's there. Poland is next, and I'm in the middle of applying for a Fulbright Teaching Assistantship for the 2008-2009 Academic Year.

A Fulbright Grant is a grant issued for Graduate Level Research in another country. Or, you can be an English Teaching Assistant in certain countries. It is issued by the U.S. State Dept, and let me just say, damn.

Because by the time you get through even FINDING three references (completed hard copy and online); the two essays justifying your cavorting around Europe (hard copy and online); a background check that goes so far up your colon you can see the lights on your molars (hard copy and online); and two face to face interviews to justify your cavorting around Europe (with a straight face, one in New York)- by the time you do all this, you have an undergraduate degree in MS Word and can format a crocheting project on two different operating platforms- as well as smell out the last Reference, who is en flight to Canada ("I SEE YOU!")

Because, it is one thing to lay awake and night and realize that you were not selected because the next person was more qualified. It is a completely different issue to lie awake at night, and realize you were not selected because your written Polish made more sense than your "Formatted" essay.

Did I mention that each School has a specialized Advisor, who you are required to consult with while preparing this grant?

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